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Inspire Me (October 2002)True stories, quotes and information on inspiration, leadership and kindness to provide hope and direction in your life.
The
Circle of Kindness A cashier at a local hardware store is nearing the end of her shift. The store's air conditioning system isn't working, several sale items aren't priced correctly, her previous customer shouted at her and stormed out of the store and on top of all that, her feet are tired and aching. She finishes ringing up her current customer's order, who turns to her before leaving, gives her a warm smile, and says "You have a nice day." This unexpected gesture is like a cool breeze that makes her forget about the heat, the tantrums, and her tired feet. She smiles and thanks the next customer for his patience. Suddenly his long wait in line seems trivial compared to what this woman has been dealing with all day. This man in turn drives away from the store feeling more patient. He spots an elderly woman approaching an upcoming crosswalk, he stops and motions for her to cross with a wave of his hand and a smile. This woman is grateful to the driver for being patient enough to let her cross the street. As she continues down the street, she smiles and waves at a young girl sitting alone on a porch. The little girl, happy to be noticed, waves back and suddenly notices the little boy next door whom she invites over to play Frisbee. This pleases the little boy because his older brother won't give him the time of day. As the children play, the Frisbee flies into the yard of the new family on the block. When the little boy retrieves the toy, he invites the new kid to join in the game. This warms the heart of the new kids mother, so she hugs her husband and tells him that she thinks their son will make lots of new friends. This makes the husband happy as he leaves for the hardware store to buy supplies. When he pays for his purchases he smiles at the clerk, who looks tired but cheerful, and he says "Have a nice day!"
Get
a Life...a Real Life! "It's
a great honor for me to be the third member of my family to receive an honorary
doctorate from this great university. It's an honor to follow my great Uncle Jim,
who was gifted physician, and my Uncle Jack, who is a remarkable businessman.
Both of them could have told you something important about their professions, about medicine or commerce. I have no specialized field of interest or expertise, which puts me at a disadvantage talking to you today. I'm a novelist. My work is human nature. Real life is all I know. Don't ever confuse the two, your life and your work. The second is only part of the first. Don't ever forget what a friend once wrote Senator Paul Tsongas when the senator decided not to run for reelection because he had been diagnosed with cancer: "No man ever said on his deathbed, "I wish I had spent more time at the office.'" Don't
ever forget the words my father sent me on a postcard last year: "If you
win the rat race, you're still a rat." Or what John Lennon wrote before he
was gunned down in the driveway of the Dakota: "Life is what happens while
you are busy making other plans." You will walk out of here this afternoon with only one thing that no one else has. There will be hundreds of people out there with your same degree; there will be thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living! But you will be the only person alive who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at a desk, or your life on a bus, or in a car, or at the computer. Not just the life of your mind, but the life of your heart. Not just your bank account, but your soul. People
don't talk about the soul very much anymore. It's so much easier to write a resume
than to craft a spirit. But a resume is a cold comfort on a winter night, or when
you're sad, or broke, or lonely, or when you've gotten back the test results and
they're not so good. Here
is my resume: I am a good mother to three children. I have tried never to let
my profession stand in the way of being a good parent. I no longer consider myself
the center of the universe. I show up. I listen. I try to laugh. I am a good friend
to my husband. I have tried to make marriage vows mean what they say. I am a good
friend to my friends, and they to me. Without them, there would be nothing to
say to you today, because I would be a cardboard cutout. But I call them on the
phone, I meet them for lunch. I would be rotten, or at best mediocre at my job
if those other things were not true. You
cannot be really first rate at your work if your work is all you are. So
here's what I wanted to tell you today: Get a life. A real life, not a manic pursuit
of the next promotion, the bigger paycheck, the larger house. Do you think you'd
care so very much about those things if you blew an aneurysm one afternoon, or
found a lump in your breast? Get
a life in which you notice the smell of salt water pushing itself on a breeze
over Seaside Heights, a life in which you stop and watch how a red tailed hawk
circles over the water or the way a baby scowls with concentration when she tries
to pick up a Cheerio with her thumb and first finger. Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure, it is work. Pick up the phone. Send an e-mail. Write a letter. Get a life in which you are generous. And realize that life is the best thing ever, and that you have no business taking it or those you love for granted. Care so deeply about its goodness that you want to spread it around. Take money you would have spent on beers and give it to charity. Work in a soup kitchen. Be a big brother or sister. All
of you want to do well. But if you do not do good too, then doing well will never
be enough. It is so easy to waste our lives, our days, our hours, our minutes.
It is so easy to take for granted the color of our kids' eyes, the way the melody
in symphony rises and falls and disappears and rises again. It is so easy to exist
instead of to live. I learned to live many years ago. Something really, really
bad happened to me, something that changed my life in ways that, if I had my druthers,
it! would never have been changed at all. And
what I learned from it is what, today, seems to be the hardest lesson of all:
I
learned to love the journey, not the destination. I
learned that it is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee
you get. I
learned to look at all the good in the world and try to give some of it back because
I believed in it, completely and utterly. And
I tried to do that, in part, by telling others what I had learned. By
telling them this: Consider the lilies of the field. Look at the fuzz on a baby's ear. Read in the backyard with the sun on your face. Learn
to be happy. And think of life as a terminal illness, because if you do, you will live it with joy and passion as it ought to be lived.
By Changing Your Thinking Author Unknown By Changing Your Thinking, You change your beliefs; When you change your beliefs, You change your expectations; When you change your expectations, You change your attitude; When you change your attitude, You change your behavior; When you change your behavior, You change your performance; When you change your performance; You Change Your Life!
RUN TO WIN A monthly insert on Coaching and Leadership by Vince Lombardi
* When you are given a chance to coach, accept the offer graciously. * Look within yourself and pray for spiritual guidance. * Go meet with executives of the time and discuss your vision for the future. * When you first meet with members of the press, be humble. *Study in detail the team you've just inherited. * Be both industrious and meticulous in your analysis. Take extensive notes. Organize and file. * Discard what doesn't fit you or your material. Look for what does fit. * Evaluate the situation in terms of existing strengths and weaknesses. * Undertake a personal marketing and public relations campaign. * Call on public officials and industry executives and ask for their support. * Seek strategically to build a sense of pride in your team.
A
Cab Driver's Tale Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. When I arrived at 2:30 a.m., the building was dark except for a single light in a ground floor window. Under these circumstances, many drivers would just honk once or twice, wait a minute, then drive away. But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis as their only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled of danger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone who needs my assistance, I reasoned to myself. So I walked to the door and knocked. "Just a minute", answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 80s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940s movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware. "Would
you carry my bag out to the car?" she said. She
took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. "It's nothing", I told her. "I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated". "Oh,
you're such a good boy", she said. "It's
not the shortest way," I answered quickly. I looked in the rearview mirror. Her eyes were glistening. "I don't have any family left," she continued. "The doctor says I don't have very long." I
quietly reached over and shut off the meter. For
the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where
she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood
where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing. As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, "I'm tired. Let's go now." We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I
opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. "How
much do I owe you?" she asked, reaching into her purse. "You have to make a living," she answered. "There are other passengers," I responded. Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly. "You
gave an old woman a little moment of joy," she said. I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away? On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more important in my life. We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware--beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one. PEOPLE MAY NOT REMEMBER EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID, OR WHAT YOU SAID, BUT THEY WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HOW YOU MADE THEM FEEL.
For Your Quote Book (submitted by Katherine Ginsbach of Hot Springs, South Dakota) "I've Missed More than 9000 shots in my life...I've lost almost 300 games...Ive been trusted 26 times to take the winning shot and missed...I've failed over and over again, and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan I
never looked at the consequences of missing a big shot... when you think about
the consequences you always think of a negative result. Just
play. Have fun. Enjoy the game. I
can accept failure, but I can't accept not trying.
Every Kid Needs A Role Model The summer before my ninth grade year I felt as if my life was meaningless. My oldest brother had been incarcerated for 3 years, my parents and I didn't get along, and I felt as if I was losing the spotlight in basketball. While attending a summer basketball camp in Georgia at Brenau College, I met a college basketball player named Jana Ashley. She played at the University of North Alabama, and my high school coach had been her high school coach. I had met her at my school before when she came to practice with us, but I had never sat down at talked to her. While at that camp I spent some time with Jana. One day we went out to eat and talked about my family, Coach Creekmore, and basketball. I also spent some time with her in her room, at the gym, and in my dorm. Over that week we became friends, and since then we have been staying in touch with each other. Jana has taught me a lot; she has given me someone I can talk to about anything. She taught me that in basketball you don't have to be in the spotlight all the time to be consider an awesome player, you just have to have your heart in it. Every kid needs a role model, most look to famous movie stars or athletes. I
have determined that a true role model is someone that will, even though they
are older than you, take time out of their life to talk to you and give you advice
when you need them the most. Whenever I am down or feel like giving up on life
I think of Jana and know that one-day I want to be to some little girl what she
is to me now.
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